The week in review

October 23, 2016

By Nan Lawson

Art by Nan Lawson; buy the print here.

Hello, hello! Here’s what I got up to this week…


Stop What You’re Doing And Look At This Hot Harry Potter Boudoir Shoot


Three excellent and related pieces from Racked: A Closer Look at Debate Makeup, The New Pantsuit, and Meet the Makeup Artist Who Remade Hillary, Picked Lint Off Bernie.

Hillary Clinton’s Locker-Room Talk, NY Mag. “Ben Carson looked desperately at Paul Ryan, wanting him to do something, anything. Paul just shrugged. What could he do? She was the president now. If she wanted to hang out in congressional locker rooms and “inspect the goods” (as she liked to say), how could anyone stop her? ‘Ben,’ Paul Ryan whispered. ‘You know that if you’re in charge, you get to do whatever you want to the people beneath you. That’s what we believe.’ Ben nodded. Of course that was right. How could that not be right?”

“You Girls Having Fun?”, Eater. This is SO good.

Are You Ready to Meet Your Fixer Uppers?, Texas Monthly.

The last debate: Donald Trump doesn’t care about democracy, The Washington Post. “I would be happy to talk about Aleppo, but honestly, it would pain me for people around the globe to have to hear him talk about Aleppo.”

Hillary Clinton’s 3 debate performances left the Trump campaign in ruins, Vox.

Children Don’t Always Live, The New York Times. “When I realized Greta would not live, I wanted to die so purely, and so simply. I could feel my heart gazing up at me quizzically, asking me in between beats: ‘Are you sure you want me to keep doing this?’ But I found I could not give the order. Since my son was born, I’ve caught myself making concrete plans for my suicide if he were to die. I will draft a letter to my parents, or even tell them face-to-face. ‘I’m going to meet my children,’ I will say. If the world takes this one, I am not meant to be here. It is a frightening thought because it is so logical. How would anyone argue me out of it? Who would even try?”

Thousands of California soldiers forced to repay enlistment bonuses a decade after going to war, LA Times.

I WENT UNDERCOVER INTO THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN… AND COULDN’T BELIEVE WHAT I FOUND, Scott David Shapiro on Medium. This hed is awful but the piece is actually really interesting!

The Weird Economics Of Ikea, FiveThirtyEight.

Lainey Is Yours in Gossip, The Ringer.

When My Grandkids Ask Me What I Did to Fight American Fascism, I’ll Proudly Tell Them I Tweeted a Few Times., McSweeney’s.

When truth is stranger than fiction: TV writers weigh in on the presidential campaign, Los Angeles Times.

What 130 of the Worst Shootings Say About Guns in America, The New York Times.

Nasty women have much work to do, The Washington Post.

Shedding the Third Tear: Donald Trump’s Kitschy World, Los Angeles Review of Books.

Hillary Clinton Has a Power That No Man Can Take Away, Slate.

23 Real AF Jokes That Will Make All Feminists Laugh, BuzzFeed. “ITEMS EVERY WOMAN SHOULD OWN: -Little Black Dress -Cute flats -Strappy s- ok now that the men have stopped reading, we revolt at dawn.”

Everything you’ve ever wanted to know about my abortion, Bridget Todd on Medium.

7 Popular Mormon Bloggers on Why They Would Never Vote for Donald Trump, NY Mag.

Eight Women in Love, n+1.

This Is Not Forever: How to Break Up, Brooklyn Magazine. “Don’t let yourself make a museum of them, don’t scroll through old texts and old photographs, don’t like their Instagram posts from 2014. Don’t imagine them coming back. Don’t ask mutual friends if they’re seeing someone new. Don’t put your heart in the fire anymore.”


Black Jeopardy! and A Girl’s Halloween (SO painfully real), PBS’s Hamilton special and this Hamilton/Hillary rap, the trailer for Good Girls Revolt, this fantasy gender reveal, the return of Jane the Virgin, and the moment people realized they were dating idiots.

The week ahead…

Prepping for Halloween on The Today Show!

The week in review

October 16, 2016

Illustration by Charlotte Gomez

On Monday, the day after the debate, I took my work inbox from 4600 emails* down to zero. *Read emails, I’m not a monster. It was amazing. Highly recommend as an alternative to mindlessly scrolling through Twitter for hours.

Also, we had adorable baby animals in our office.

Here’s what else I got up to this week!


Stop What You’re Doing And Look At This Hot Harry Potter Boudoir Shoot


Trump’s One Public Service Was Exposing the Misogyny of the GOP, NY Mag.

How to Be a Man in the Age of Trump, The New York Times. “‘Don’t sexually assault women’ (or, for that matter, ‘Don’t get a girl pregnant’) is an awfully low bar for acceptable behavior. It does little to address the complexity of boys’ lives, the presumption of their always-down-for-it sexuality, the threat of being called a ‘pussy’ if you won’t grab one, the collusion that comes with keeping quiet. Boys need continuing, serious guidance about sexual ethics, reciprocity, respect. Rather than silence or swagger, they need models of masculinity that are not grounded in domination or aggression.”

I Was Pregnant, And Then I Wasn’t, BuzzFeed. Prepare to weep when reading this.

Bias Isn’t Just A Police Problem, It’s A Preschool Problem, NPR.

The Wing: Do Women Still Need a Space of Their Own?, NY Mag.

The Snarling Girl, Hazlitt. “What makes a work of art special and meaningful is your private relationship with it, the magic of finding it amidst the noise and distraction, the magic of letting it speak to you directly. You found it, it’s yours. (This, however, requires the awesome skill of being able to think for yourself in the first place; hardly a given.) Art can change you; it can move and validate and shift and bait and wreck and kindle you in the best way. And others who feel similarly about said work can be your kin. It is not a more-is-better equation.”

Shakespeare Explains the 2016 Election, The New York Times.

How #TrumpDrSeuss Hilariously Stole Twitter, The Huffington Post.

The irony of ironies: Trump destroys the brand, The Washington Post.

Donald Trump’s Interesting 24 Hours, The New Yorker. “2:36 p.m. Receives a text message. Heart skips a beat—Putin?!?! 2:37 p.m. Asks an aide who Mike Pence is.”

I’m one of the Central Park Five. Donald Trump won’t leave me alone., The Washington Post.

It Hurts to Admit This, But Mascots Is a Tragedy, Jezebel. Every word of this is extremely true.

How Hillary Became ‘Hillary’, The New York Times.

The white flight of Derek Black, The Washington Post.

Rush Limbaugh Takes a Stand Against Consensual Sex, The Stranger.

Corporate Life Hack: Be More Like Al Roker., Small Business Forum.


This tweet and the follow up, Fleabag on Amazon, Ezra Klein on Hillary Clinton, Alex Jones (the Infowars guy) melting down here and here, this wild demonstration of male bullshit, Seth Meyers at the Pentagon, Michelle Obama’s New Hampshire speech (good thread on it here), these young feminists, and this incredible Halloween video.

The week ahead…

It’s about time to start making some Halloween costumes!

The week in review

October 9, 2016

Teamed up with the wonderful Will Varner on this comic. 

WHEW! What a week! What a WEEKEND! It seems like so long ago that we were watching Lucius Malfoy lie through his teeth in the VP debate, and yet that was still just a few days ago!

Woof. Here’s what else I was up to this week…


22 Genius Tips Every Picky Eater Should Try

Make America Rape Again

My thoughts on the idea that the GOP only denounced Trump when he comes for white women. (FYI, the tweets aren’t showing in order on my desktop but it’s fine in the Twitter app.)


Donald Trump, Shamer in Chief, The Nation. This is probably the best thing I’ve read during this election. Long read, but worth the time.

Mike Pence loves Big Donald, The Washington Post. Alexandra Petri is a treasure.

The Pences Visit Manhattan, The New Yorker.

Inside Hillary Clinton’s Betamax castle of millennial outreach, The Washington Post.

Donald and Billy on the Bus, The New York Times.

This Wasn’t a Debate. This Was a National Gaslighting., Slate.

Kellyanne Conway’s Political Machinations, The New Yorker.

Trump: ‘I Know That Was Pretty Bad, But Let’s Just Say You’re Going To Want To Save Your Energy’, The Onion.

Throw Your Top Sheet In The Trash, BuzzFeed.

Ask Polly: I’m Trapped With a Nice Guy in the Wrong Country!, NY Mag. Another great answer from Polly.

‘We have your daughter’: A virtual kidnapping and a mother’s five hours of hell, The Washington Post.

Raising Race-Conscious Children, A Cup of Jo.

My Life in the Romance Novel Industry, Catapult.

Support Birth Of A Nation Or Not, But Just Know That Nate Parker Is Probably Peak Fuckboy, Very Smart Brothas.

Good twitter threads: all the ways Trump’s “apology” sounds exactly the same way abusers’ do, Billy Bush is trash, and why racial progress needs the law behind it.


Crucible Cast Party, Kellyanne’s day off, and what it’s like watching conservative Twitter right now.

The week ahead…

I’ll see you on the other side of this debate! Godspeed.

Make America Rape Again

October 7, 2016

Friendly reminder: if you think approaching women and then kissing them before they have a chance to object or to consent is remotely acceptable behavior, you’re part of the problem.

If you think that grabbing women you don’t know and who have not consented “by the pussy” — like, I don’t know, we’re god damn BOWLING BALLS — is remotely acceptable behavior, you’re part of the problem.

If you think that bragging about committing battery/sexual assault is just standard locker room talk, and if you’d simply laugh if someone made these comments in front of you instead of condemning it for the rapey, fucked-up, actually illegal behavior that it is, you’re part of the problem.

If you don’t understand why, after decades of being told how to protect ourselves from predators and being blamed for the crimes men commit against our bodies, women would hear anything but red flags and alarm bells and DANGER! DANGER! DANGER! in Trump’s comments, you’re part of the problem.

If you are a grown-ass adult who is still using the phrase “boys will be boys” in the year 2016, you are part of the problem.

If you’re one of the men who has slipped a hand under my dress in a bar or in a crowded van on the way to a fraternity–sorority event — one of the many men who literally believes, like Donald Trump, they can do anything they want to women, including grabbing women like me ~by the pussy~, because you think you’re entitled to everything you want and also sometimes forget that women are actually people — or if you’re embarrassed and ashamed because you’ve said or done or witnessed similar things and so your instinct is to jump in and defend Trump’s statements and his behavior (or to just quietly say nothing and hope no one asks you what you think which it seems like is a lot of people’s preferred route tonight) please remember that one incredible way to right that wrong is to take a stance against that behavior NOW. It’s not too late for you to stop perpetuating rape culture. Until you do that, you are normalizing this behavior and ensuring it will continue to exist, and that makes you part of the problem.

If you think that not voting or voting third party means you’re somehow better than people who are voting for Trump, A) it doesn’t, and B) holy shit, you are part of the problem.

If you haven’t watched the videos of Trump’s supporters and then thought long and hard, with an open mind and an open heart, about what it would be like to be a brown person, or a queer person, or a woman, or a Muslim person, or a disabled person, or an immigrant, or a trans person, or a Jewish person OR ALL OF THE ABOVE in Trump’s America — if you haven’t wanted to do that because it would make you FEEL SOME THINGS and you would simply rather not — you are part of the problem.

If you’re not with her, you’re not with any of us, and you are part of the problem.

If you aren’t actively against Donald Trump in word and in deed — even when it’s inconvenient, even when it’s tiring, even when it requires you to have uncomfortable conversations with people you care about and respect and love, even when it’s easier to say it would be pointless anyway, even when it means going through the painful process of examining your own upbringing, past behavior, and deeply-held beliefs, even if you’re worried that means that your masculinity may be attacked or it might cost you friends, even if you’re worried it means some woman who you don’t like might get something you don’t think she deserves, even if it’s HARD and EXHAUSTING and you don’t WANNA because TALKING about POLITICS is STRESSFUL and OH MY GOD HAVE I MISSED ANY EXCUSES FROM THE ENCYCLOPEDIA OF STRAIGHT WHITE MALE BULLSHIT PROBABLY CERTAINLY BUT FORGIVE ME FOR I’VE BLACKED OUT FROM THE RAGE — you are part of the fucking problem.

Do better.

The week in review

October 2, 2016

Art by Libby VanderPloeg

Last week, I legitimately thought every single day was September 30th, and was taken aback every single day when, mid-morning, I realized that it was not yet that day. And then on Friday — September motherfuckin’ 30th— I was completely sure it was October 1st. Like ????

Aside from having to check my calendar a whole lot, here’s what else I was up to…


23 Things Every Grown-Ass Adult Should Do

This chart.

Also, I was a guest on Another Round! You can listen here.


27 Hilarious Tweets You’ll Only Get If You Watched The Debate, BuzzFeed.

You Want A Piece Of Me, MTV. Some dickhead went ahead and (supposedly, probably) revealed Elena Ferrante’s true identity. Instead of reading that, read this very good post instead!

Ted Cruz and his conscience amicably part ways, The Washington Post. So funny.

So, Which Is It?, It’s Fine. For your racist cousins.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s Advice for Living, The New York Times.

Jailed When Her Boyfriend Killed Her Son, She Is Free At Last, BuzzFeed.

The Absolute Minimum Acceptable Tip for Any Food Delivery Is $5, Eater. Helen Rosner is a very smart human so I’m inclined to agree with her on this.

The Novelist Disguised As a Housewife, NY Mag.

Why the mediocre male’s days may be numbered, The Guardian. We can only hope.

The Day Hillary Clinton Won My Heart, Scary Mommy. I made it to the second sentence before I started crying.

Why Do Obese Patients Get Worse Care? Many Doctors Don’t See Past the Fat, The New York Times.

Stop Pretending You Don’t Know Why People Hate Hillary Clinton, The Huffington Post.

In ‘Hitler,’ an Ascent From ‘Dunderhead’ to Demagogue, The New York Times.

The New Yorker’s Topical Comedy Is a Disgrace and The 38 Things Wrong With the New Yorker’s Oompa Loompa Gene Wilder Tribute Cartoon, Slate. This is sooo extra but pretty funny/accurate.

17 Posts That Prove Your Brain Is An Asshole, BuzzFeed.

How could sexism hurt Clinton in the debates? These female high school debaters know., The Washington Post. God, this made me angry.

I Should Not Have Had to Write This, Quaint Magazine. (Head’s up this is about domestic violence.)

Trump says he will only lose Pennsylvania if there’s widespread voter fraud. That’s very wrong., The Washington Post.

LeBron James: Why I’m endorsing Hillary Clinton, Business Insider.

14 Situations That Are Way Too Real When You’re A Woman, BuzzFeed. Giggled through this entire thing.

There’s No Such Thing As A Protest Vote, by Clay Shirky on Medium. “But it doesn’t matter what message you think you are sending, because no one will receive it. No one is listening. The system is set up so that every choice other than ‘R’ or ‘D’ boils down to ‘I defer to the judgement of my fellow citizens.’ It’s easy to argue that our system shouldn’t work like that. It’s impossible to argue it doesn’t work like that.”


The Amanda Knox documentary on Netflix (I thought it was just OK; this author’s description of her thoughts on Amanda Knox before watching the doc perfectly match my own…actually all of her thoughts match mine pretty closely), this nail polish trick, Samantha Bee on HRC, and John Oliver on the candidates’ scandals.


This amazing Twitter thread (keep clicking “Read More”), this hilarious relationship question, and this tweet.

The week ahead…

God, I’m just SO happy it’s October and fall weather is finally here!!!!!!

The week in review

September 25, 2016


Photo by Taylor Miller; had the necklace made here.

Hello and happy Sunday! I’m back in action after losing all of last weekend to a horrible cold. When I wasn’t playing Whack-a-Mole with racists on Facebook or breaking in my new fall booties, here’s what I was up to this week…


I Learned To Love Cottage Cheese & So Can You

My Food Diary, Re-Written by a Celebrity Features Writer

So A Special Sleeping Bra Exists And It’s Less Bad Than You’d Think

9 Things That Will Take Your Bed To The Next Level

Exactly What Was Wrong With The First 50 Hot Selfies I Took But Did Not Send


Hillary Clinton for President, The New York Times. “This endorsement would also be an empty exercise if it merely affirmed the choice of Clinton supporters. We’re aiming instead to persuade those of you who are hesitating to vote for Mrs. Clinton — because you are reluctant to vote for a Democrat, or for another Clinton, or for a candidate who might appear, on the surface, not to offer change from an establishment that seems indifferent and a political system that seems broken. Running down the other guy won’t suffice to make that argument. The best case for Hillary Clinton cannot be, and is not, that she isn’t Donald Trump. The best case is, instead, about the challenges this country faces, and Mrs. Clinton’s capacity to rise to them.” This endorsement so thoughtful and well-done.

Hating Trump isn’t enough – we need to talk about why Clinton rules, The Guardian.

No, I’m from New York, The New Yorker. Literally laughed out loud through this whole thing.

Donald Trump Either Lied to Republicans or Broke the Law, Newsweek.

Ask Polly: Why Do Women Obsess About Babies and Fertility?, NY Mag. One of my faves this week.

Brangelina Is Dead; Long Live Angelina, BuzzFeed.

15 Career Tips From Smart Women, A Cup of Jo.

Men, Please Throw Away Your Crappy Old Pillows, MEL.

I Regret Not Telling My Hair Stylist That Her Service Was Poor, Beautifully Brown. This describes my hairdresser so perfectly, it’s a little eerie.

Me, A Chill Girl With No Feelings, Gabby Boyd on Medium. “Vulnerability is not very chill, and leads a person to start requesting luxuries, like communication and effort.”

My teen boys are blind to rape culture, The Washington Post. Oof. 

He Had His Reasons, Granta. This is fantastic. (Head’s up that it discusses murder, domestic violence, and suicide.)

How to Be a Writer: 10 Tips from Rebecca Solnit, Literary Hub. These are great tips; I need to re-read them like once a week.

17 Things No One Tells You About Being On Jeopardy!, BuzzFeed.

“I Hurt With Her,” She Said & I Took Note, Hands Free Mama. Pay no attention to me sobbing in a bodega reading this.

Rest Of Nation To Penn State: ‘Something Is Very Wrong With All Of You’, The Onion. This is perfect.

Fear of a Female President, The Atlantic. “Standard commentary about Clinton’s candidacy—which focuses on her email server, the Benghazi attack, her oratorical deficiencies, her struggles with ‘authenticity’—doesn’t explain the intensity of this opposition. But the academic literature about how men respond to women who assume traditionally male roles does. And it is highly disturbing.”

30 Of The Gayest Pictures Of LGBT People As Kids, BuzzFeed. It’s basically impossible not to smile when reading this.

I Drank Butter Coffee For A Month And It Was More Magical Than I Expected, BuzzFeed.

Trump used $258,000 from his charity to settle legal problems, The Washington Post.

‘The Condition of Black Life Is One of Mourning’, The New York Times Magazine. Set my subway tears in motion after a particularly rough week.

Hillary Clinton’s ‘Angry’ Face, The New York Times.

This Featherless Lovebird Is Actually So, So Cute, BuzzFeed. It me.

Fall Is the Worst Season, Jezebel. Terrible opinion, excellent writing.


Samantha Bee and Seth Meyers, the hoes who use the dog filter (I FEEL SO SEEN BY THIS?!), this thread, this tweet, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt at BuzzFeed.

The week ahead…

Screaming at the TV during the debate, most likely.

The week in review

September 11, 2016

Smash the Patriarchy

Embroidery & photo by MoonriseWhims; buy it here.

HELLO! Here’s what I got up to this week…


The World Is Shit, So Here’s A Little Feel-Good Routine


How Hillary Clinton can get that ‘presidential look’, The Washington Post. This is AMAZING; Alexandra Petri is such a gem.

The 24-Year-Old Coca-Cola Virgin, Eater. I loved every word of this.

When Detectives Dismiss Rape Reports Before Investigating Them, BuzzFeed. This is truly outrageous.

You Can Write Your Way Out of an Emotional Funk. Here’s How., The Science of Us.

Emily Charlton — The Devil Wears Prada Erotic Fan Fiction, Amanda Rosenberg on Medium.

16 Simple Ways To Be More Productive And Actually Get Shit Done, BuzzFeed. Some really good tips here. 

Colin Kaepernick’s Protest Has Nothing to Do With the Military, The Nation.

How Donald Trump retooled his charity to spend other people’s money, The Washington Post. 

Jason Pierre-Paul Is Suing ESPN Because Its Reporting Was Too Accurate, Deadspin.

How Arianna Huffington Lost Her Newsroom and The Inside Story of Why Arianna Huffington Left the Huffington Post, Vanity Fair.

Why Doesn’t Keeping Up With the Kardashians Show the Nannies?, NY Mag.

How Phyllis Schlafly’s Legacy Paved the Way for Today’s Ann Coulters, Jezebel. 

How Elizabeth Holmes’s House of Cards Came Tumbling Down, Vanity Fair. This is WILD.

We recommend Hillary Clinton for president, Dallas Morning News.

When Will New York City Sink?, NY Mag.

I also re-read Gone Girl this weekend, so obviously I am a peach to be around right now.

The week ahead…

Thinking about finally buying some booties!

The week in review

September 4, 2016

This week, I experienced the most incredible NYC sunset, shared the collective outrage at Anthony Weiner and the dipshit writer of that godawful headphones article, got a press package from Bath & Body Works containing no less than seven different pumpkin fragrances (?!?!), fiiiiinally ordered new glasses from Warby Parker after picking a pair out at the D.C. store back in February, and received my first-ever emails from Chelsea from Thinx!!! Here’s what else I got up to…


FYI, I Have Loved Fall Since Like Forever


So, I set aside Sweetbitter briefly (it was…not hard to put down) so I could read The Underground Railroad. I read it in one sitting on Saturday. It is gripping, spooky, upsetting, and will stick with me for a very long time. Definitely recommend it.

So, You Must Talk to the Woman Who Is Wearing Headphones, The Washington Post.

How To Talk To A Woman Even Though She’s A Ghost, BuzzFeed.

I Have Decided to Marry My Catcaller and Here is Our Wedding Registry, McSweeney’s.

How To Talk To A Woman In A Diabetic Coma, Very Smart Brothas.

Also still laughing at this very good Tweet and this one.

The Real Trumpettes of Bel Air, Politico.

The Perilous Lure of the Underground Railroad, The New Yorker.

Stop Blaming Huma for Her Husband’s Epic Fail(s), A Practical Wedding. “Weiner had one goddamn job.”

Stop Trying to Make Anthony Weiner’s Sexting a Political Issue, New York Magazine.

There’s never been a better time to watch the beguiling Anthony Weiner documentary Weiner, Vox. Also this tweet about Weiner made me laugh out loud.

Why Am I So Fat?, Sara Benincasa on Medium.

How Fox News Women Took Down Roger Ailes, New York Magazine.

Framed, LA Times. I knew the bare bones of this story already but OMG this whole thing is so gripping.

Shit happens: I spent two terrible weeks on a Kardashian-endorsed ‘teatox’, Fusion.

The Comfort of a Digital Confidante, The Atlantic. “Perhaps, then, that Instagram shot or confessional tweet isn’t always meant to evoke some mythical, pretend version of ourselves, but instead seeks to invoke the imagined perfect audience—the non-existent people who will see us exactly as we want to be seen. We are not curating an ideal self, but rather, an ideal Other, a fantasy in which our struggle to become ourselves is met with the utmost empathy.”

What happens when sexual assault happens on a long-haul flight., Slate.

The Distinct Pleasure of the House Dress, Racked. I’m not currently a house dress person, but they make a good case.

Huma Abedin Doesn’t Have To Be “The Good Wife” Anymore, BuzzFeed.

Adult Learning: How to break the pattern of dating Man-babies, She Does the City. Oh…oh this is good.

23 Really Funny Tumblr Posts That Are Just About, Like, Life, BuzzFeed.

Not All Men? Well, actually…, Alicen Grey on Medium.

Oops I Made A Feminist Joke On The Internet, Sara Schaefer on Medium.

The Long-Lasting Legacy of the Great Migration, Smithsonian Magazine. Great piece by the author of The Warmth of Other Sons, which I highly recommend.

The Most Exclusive Restaurant in America, The New Yorker. I saw this post going around last weekend and didn’t really connect with the hed, but after two friends recommended it, I decided to read it and I’m SO glad I did. Totally bizarre/fascinating!

Why sons hold marriages together, 1843.

Elizabeth Smart Is Standing Up for Rape Victims—And Tearing Down Purity Culture, Broadly.

‘Birth of a Nation’ actress Gabrielle Union: I cannot take Nate Parker rape allegations lightly, LA Times.

Patriotism is for Black People: Colin Kaepernick, Donald Trump and the Selectivity of White Rage, Tim Wise. “It has always been thus: Patriotism is for black people, meaning that it is they (or perhaps other immigrants of color) who are expected to show gratitude, to ignore the nation’s flaws, to sign off on America’s greatness without reservation, because anything less is presumptive evidence of disloyalty. And it makes sense, really. After all, when your nation was built by the deliberate oppression of black and brown peoples, the exploitation of their labor, and the theft of indigenous land — and anyone who would deny this is insufficiently educated to be taken seriously — it is especially vital to police their devotion and fealty to the edifice that marginalized them; to punish them for any deviation. Because to allow them the space to criticize, to condemn, and to castigate, is to allow them the space to organize, and to fight, and to transform.”

Insulting Colin Kaepernick says more about our patriotism than his, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar in the Washington Post. “What should horrify Americans is not Kaepernick’s choice to remain seated during the national anthem, but that nearly 50 years after Ali was banned from boxing for his stance and Tommie Smith and John Carlos’s raised fists caused public ostracization and numerous death threats, we still need to call attention to the same racial inequities. Failure to fix this problem is what’s really un-American here.”

Colin Kaepernick’s True Sin, The Atlantic. “And so Kaepernick’s detractors, when they are not insisting his protest is unpatriotic, or disrespectful to the military, mock his background, upbringing, and success. Photos of Kaepernick with his adoptive parents, mocking the idea that Kaepernick is ‘oppressed,’ have been widely shared on social media. (The notion that Kaepernick’s proximity to whiteness renders him less ‘oppressed’ is less a rebuttal of Kaepernick’s point than an unequivocal affirmation.)”

Also this Tweet.

Trapped in Tollbooths, and Targets of Harassment, The New York Times.

We All Scream for Ice Cream, The New Yorker.

19 Tweets That Will Speak To You If You Think People Are The Worst, BuzzFeed.

One of the Most Important Crosswords in New York Times History, Slate.

How to Tell a Mother Her Child Is Dead, The New York Times. “If she asks you, you will tell her what you know. You do not lie. But do not say he was murdered or he was killed. Yes, I know that he was, but that is not what you say. You say that he died; that is the part that you saw and that you know. When she asks if he felt any pain, you must be very careful. If he did not, you assure her quickly. If he did, you do not lie. But his pain is over now. Do not ever say he was lucky that he did not feel pain. He was not lucky. She is not lucky. Don’t make that face. The depth of the stupidity of the things you will say sometimes is unimaginable.”

Killer Robots Are Coming And These People Are Trying To Stop Them, BuzzFeed.

I Just Have a Few Questions About Last Night’s VMAs, This whole thing is just gold.

Entertained by

Congratulations,” this perfect parody of food blogging, if Disney princesses were on The Bachelor, Weiner, this Tweet and this one, You’re the Worst (I’m re-watching the first two seasons because I love it so), and a stock video of a woman counting.

The week ahead…

At the behest of my friend Rachel Sanders, I will be experiencing life without a top sheet for the first time ever.

The week in review

August 28, 2016

Patch & photo by Hand Over Your Fairy Cakes; buy it here.

HI! Just taking a brief break from my vagenda of manocide to share the best stuff from this week!


This week I finished The Nest (really great writing, but I really didn’t like the ending) and Modern Lovers (very good all the way through), and now I’m starting Sweetbitter, which my friend Rachel described as “absolutely horrible writing, but I couldn’t put it down.”

Today’s Vagenda, Sara Schaefer on Medium. “1:30 pm. Doctor’s appointment — ask about ‘pleasure abortions.’ Do they do group packages? Alison’s birthday is coming up. 2:55 pm. Retail therapy; there’s a sale at Michael’s. Purchase 37 mason jars. Text Jenny for her scrotum-infused kombucha recipe. Commit vehicular manocide in the parking lot. Text while driving; tell the internet mob they can stop — you’ve just killed the man you falsely accused of rape.”

The Uber Killer: The Real Story of One Night of Terror, GQ. This is just chilling.

Inside Glossier, The Beauty Startup That Just Happens To Sell Makeup, BuzzFeed.

The Exact Moment Amal Clooney Realized She Settled, The Cut.

98 Photos From My Camera Roll That Will Make You Say “Jen, That’s Way Too Many Pictures Of John Stamos”, BuzzFeed.

This style guide from 2007 proves Nick Denton’s blog invented web writing, Insider. Very good writing advice here.

The writing class I’d like to teach, Signal v. Noise.

The Charmed Life of Pandora, Racked.

Black Health Matters, The New York Times. “All the rage and mourning and angst works to exhaust you; it eats you alive with its relentlessness. These slayings obey no humane logic. They force you to reconcile your own helplessness in the face of such brutal injustice, and the terrifying reality that it could happen to you, or someone you hold dear.”

The bizarre true story behind the “this is a work of fiction” disclaimer, Slate. The most interesting thing about this to me is that a female researcher tried to stop them from getting sued, and they didn’t listen to her…and then they got sued.

The Age of Post-Truth Politics, The New York Times.

From the attic to the Smithsonian: black history museum is full of ‘found’ items, The Guardian.

Inside Facebook’s (Totally Insane, Unintentionally Gigantic, Hyperpartisan) Political-Media Machine, The New York Times.

Fat Shaming is Not an Individual Problem, It’s a Cultural One, Lesley Kinzel on Medium. “Certainly, beauty standards and body shaming affect and hurt all women. But they hurt fat women in ways that are different and far more specific and debilitating than women who are not fat, with measurable impacts ranging from the psychological to the economic. ‘It’s okay to be curvy but nobody should be obese.’ Choke on that trash before you ever say it again. Effectively supporting women who fight against fat shaming means supporting all women who are in the battle, even the women who make you most uncomfortable. Especially those women. Shaming comments do not get less damaging the fatter a person is; it’s actually the other way around. The women who need your support the most are also the ones least likely to get it.” Choke. On. That. Trash.

Entertained by

Mr. Reed, David Cross on date rape (an oldie but a goodie!), this tweet and this one, this actual hero, and this Black Girl magic.

The week ahead…

Keeping my eye on the prize: the three-day weekend!

The week in review

August 21, 2016


Hi, guys! Besides hanging out with a chill Pomeranian named Boots at a pool party, here’s what I got up to this week…


Guys, We Need To Talk About Pooping & Farting In Romantic Relationships

Can You Get Through This Post Without Yelling “What The FUCK, People?!”

Here’s How To Use A Bullet Journal For Better Mental Health


I finished reading The Girls this weekend and am going to start The Nest tonight.

Enjoli by Kristi Coulter on Medium. “Is it really that hard, being a First World woman? Is it really so tough to have the career and the spouse and the pets and the herb garden and the core strengthening and the oh-I-just-woke-up-like-this makeup and the face injections and the Uber driver who might possibly be a rapist? Is it so hard to work ten hours for your rightful 77% of a salary, walk home past a drunk who invites you to suck his cock, and turn on the TV to hear the men who run this country talk about protecting you from abortion regret by forcing you to grow children inside your body? I mean, what’s the big deal? Why would anyone want to soften the edges of this glorious reality?”

Did I Kill Gawker?, New York Magazine. This is fantastic.

Dee Dee Wanted Her Daughter To Be Sick, Gypsy Wanted Her Mom To Be Murdered, BuzzFeed. This. Is. Wild.

The Era of ‘The Bitch’ Is Coming, The Atlantic.

Quiz: What Garden of Earthly Delights Abomination Are You?, Dirge. I laughed out loud.

The Science of How and Why We Swear, Gizmodo.

In U.S. Jails, a Constitutional Clash Over Air-Conditioning, The New York Times.

This Is What’s Missing From Journalism Right Now, Mother Jones.

Fighting Frizz? Then You Should’ve Put a Shower Cap on It, The New York Times. I went into this being like BLACK WOMEN HAVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR YEARS, NEW YORK TIMES. But then I learned about turban shower caps so I’m not mad anymore.

Nate Parker’s Alleged Rape And The Limits of Hollywood Damage Control, BuzzFeed.

How Nate Parker’s Rape Charges Divided Penn State’s Campus, BuzzFeed.

Nate Parker and the Limits of Empathy, The New York Times.

Asked and Answered: “This country needs more spunk.” I…legitimately wept when reading this letter.

19 Of The Funniest “Roses Are Red…” Tweets, BuzzFeed. You’re welcome.

Entertained by

Ali Wong’s standup special on Netflix. This episode of Death, Sex, and Money. The second story, “The Girl Died,” is just…wow. Also this story and this story from The Moth. Oh, and Deanna G. Carter, subway hero.

The week ahead…

Still staring at this tweet probably.

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