16. A winner don’t quit on themselves

April 23, 2017

pink journals

What a week, you guys! We had Tax Day, 4/20, and Earth Day; Venus went direct; Zookeeper Rick from the San Diego Zoo brought some of his animals to BuzzFeed (aka it was the best day of the year); I got through a major deadline and all of the emotional labor that went with it; and Lemonade turned a year old. I also hit a 31-day streak with flossing! Things are really happening.

Here’s what else I got up to…

Writing

17 Fascinating Weed Facts That Even Non-Stoners Will Enjoy

19 Gorgeous “She Sheds” That You’ll Want To Retreat To ASAP

Reading

The Heart of Whiteness: Ijeoma Oluo Interviews Rachel Dolezal, the White Woman Who Identifies as Black, The Stranger. A true mic drop on the topic of Rachel Dolezal.

Will We Abandon Women’s Rights in the Name of Progressive Politics?, NY Mag. “In the midst of one of the most activated, energized, ground-up movements in modern Democratic political history — where the energy is coming from women who remain underrepresented in state and federal legislatures — the Unity Tour, with its two men making pronouncements about what the party should do next, felt exceedingly out of touch. And the dynamic — the women doing the labor of organizing and protesting and campaigning, knocking on doors and making calls and sending postcards, while guys speak from the microphones about the need to compromise on their rights — is depressingly retro.”

SuperBabies Don’t Cry, Vela. “It seemed that, once expectant mothers, women are supposed to become conduits of total safety. I now feel inner peace and serenity. The culture implies that we should become carriers of life that will not experience what life inevitably feels—pain. I will give birth easily, comfortably, and without complications. We are encouraged to avoid all that we can never prevent. I tell my feelings what to feel, and they do, and they feel very calm, confident, and at ease. We try to stop the growing body inside us from having what all bodies inherently have: vulnerability, that crack of a doorway through which our suffering creeps.”

#Vanlife, the Bohemian Social-Media Movement, The New Yorker.

Before and After: A Buzzfeed Founder’s Renovated Rowhouse, Budget Edition, Remodelista.

Woman Attacked for Running the Boston Marathon in 1967 Is Running It Again, 50 Years Later, Jezebel + Behind The Photo That Changed The Boston Marathon Forever, Deadspin.

Inside The Online Community Of Men Who Preach Removing Condoms Without Consent, The Huffington Post.

The IHOP Years, The New Yorker.

A Woman’s Orgasm Shouldn’t Be The Goal Of Sex, The Establishment. “When fragile masculinity becomes the woman’s burden (and it always does), women find ourselves in the position of constantly propping up the men in our lives — from faking orgasms with our boyfriends to constantly telling our husbands how proud we are of them to making sure our male coworkers don’t feel bossed around (please and smiley face).” This is a not-great headline on an article that I very much agree with.

How to Read a Whole Damn Book Every Week, GQ.

Uber’s C.E.O. Plays With Fire, The New York Times.

I Just Love This Juicero Story So Much, Deadspin.

The Comments on Jillian Harris’ Blog Post About ‘Boss Moms’ Are a Wild, Emotional Ride, Jezebel.

20 Same-Sex Hookup Stories From Straight Guys, BuzzFeed. These men were SO honest, and this was a great, fascinating read.

Entertained by

Planet Earth II, “99% Invisible” episode #255 (about architect Paul Revere Williams — HIGHLY recommend…it’s only 25 minutes and it made me legit emotional), “The Longest Shortest Time” episode #74 (about an OBGYN who performs an abortion, and who had an abortion), this Reddit thread (tinfoil hats on), and this video.

The week ahead…

Just enjoying the shit out of my new pink containers.

15. Rise up

April 16, 2017

@pitapoteto

Photo: @pitapoteto

Hello and happy Easter to those who love Jesus! It’s a holiday and I’m currently working on a deadline, so it’s gonna be short and sweet this week.

Writing

19 Funny Tweets About Doing Chores That Will Make You Say “Wow, Me”

Reading

In the Shadow of a Fairy Tale, The New York Times Magazine. This Leslie Jamison piece on becoming a stepmother is an amazing longread.

She was pregnant and broke. She signed up for Uber — and fell into debt., The Washington Post.

It’s Time to Call San Bernardino’s Deadly School Shooting What It Really Was: Domestic Violence, Glamour.

How Stephen Colbert Finally Found His Elusive Groove, The New York Times. This was actually a lot more interesting than I expected it to be.

16 Surprisingly Interesting Facts About The White House Easter Egg Roll, BuzzFeed.

Laundry Is The Worst Thing In The World, Deadspin.

29 Tweets That’ll Make You Laugh Harder Than They Should, BuzzFeed.

Crucified man had prior run-in with authorities, The Washington Post.

What I Have in Common with Trump, The New Yorker.

Employee got her colleagues arrested for smoking pot at a conference and now wants a transfer, Ask a Manager. !!!!!!!!!! (Don’t miss the update here.)

Annnd Tom & Lorenzo’s Big Little Lies style recaps.

The week ahead…

Just the aforementioned deadline!

14. April showers

April 9, 2017

Vaught’s Practical Character Reader

Good evening! Here’s what I was up to besides trying not to drown this week…

Reading

The Long, Lucrative Right-wing Grift Is Blowing Up in the World’s Face, Fusion.

CNN Had a Problem. Donald Trump Solved It., The New York Times Magazine.

When you wish your baby had never been born, CNN.

Ad-World Insiders on How the Hell That Pepsi Ad Got Made, NY Mag. “This ad was the least relatable piece of communication I’ve ever seen.”

Hysteria, Witches, and The Wandering Uterus: A Brief History, LitHub.

‘I really want him to have a different life.’ How some female inmates are raising babies behind bars, The News Tribune.

How Uber Uses Psychological Tricks to Push Its Drivers’ Buttons, The New York Times.

For 18 years, I thought she was stealing my identity. Until I found her, The Guardian.

We Need to Talk About These Goddamn Shirts, Rack.

Employee won’t come back unless her coworker is fired, Ask a Manager.

The Best Part of Dressing Up Is Changing Back Into Sweats., Racked. This is extremely true.

S-Town is a stunning podcast. It probably shouldn’t have been made., Vox. I don’t agree with everything in this article, but this is overall kind of how I’m feeling now that I’ve finished S-Town.

Here’s How I Think the KUWTK Episode About Kendall’s Pepsi Controversy Will Play Out, Jezebel.

In Praise of Big Little Lies’ ‘Ban All Men’ Ending, Vulture.

Big Little Lies Director Jean-Marc Vallée on Why the Finale Gala Was the Toughest Shoot of His Career., Vulture.

Big Little Lies’ Alexander Skarsgård on How He Sees Perry and Why That Finale Scene Was Like a Nature Documentary, Vulture.

Why Are Male Critics So Baffled By ‘Big Little Lies’?, Kveller.

Also, if you loved BLL, give Reese Witherspoon’s speech from the 2015 Glamour Women of the Year Awards a read.

Loving

All of these clips and clamps, this bear, Resist Bot, and my Costco leggings.

The week ahead…

Gird your loins: Mercury went retrograde today.

13. Cold little heart

April 2, 2017

Credit: Anna Rifle Bond

Photo: Anna Rifle Bond

Hello! Here’s what I was up to this week when I wasn’t working, squawking on Twitter, or watching all of Big Little Lies

Writing

31 Things Women Used To Have To Do In Skirts That’ll Make You Say “Nah”

Do You Say “Ope!” When You Nearly Bump Into Someone?

This Dad Built A Rube Goldberg Machine For His Kid’s Gender Reveal

Reading

The High Price of Leaving Ultra-Orthodox Life, The New York Times Magazine. This is a great piece; be sure to read all the way to the end.

Unspeakable Realities Block Universal Health Coverage In America, Forbes. “Like most of my neighbors I have a good job in the private sector. Ask my neighbors about the cost of the welfare programs they enjoy and you will be greeted by baffled stares. All that we have is ‘earned’ and we perceive no need for government support. Nevertheless, taxpayers fund our retirement saving, health insurance, primary, secondary, and advanced education, daycare, commuter costs, and even our mortgages at a staggering public cost. Socialism for white people is all-enveloping, benevolent, invisible, and insulated by the nasty, deceptive notion that we have earned our benefits by our own hand.”

The religious reasons Mike Pence won’t eat alone with women don’t add up, The Washington Post. “Can you imagine a professional woman refusing to meet one-on-one with her male colleagues? ‘Sorry, Jack, but we can’t talk alone in this conference room. You might rape me!’ In 80 percent of sexual assaults, the victim knows the assailant, and 8 percent of rapes happen at work, yet I’ve never heard of a woman in the workplace — let alone the church — refusing to meet with a man.”

A Bronx Librarian Keen on Teaching Homeless Children a Lasting Love of Books, The New York Times.

How Schoolyard Drama and Domestic Violence Converge on ‘Big Little Lies’, Flavorwire.

This Is Almost Certainly James Comey’s Twitter Account, Gizmodo.

Pregnant Inmates Say a Federal Jail Is No Place for Them, and Some Judges Agree, The New York Times.

New York Has a Great Subway, if You’re Not in a Wheelchair, The New York Times.

You Will Never, in Your Entire Life, Get the Best of Maxine Waters, ELLE.

Please do not make women into statues, The Outline. I giggled my way through this.

Four Emails White People Send to Black People When Black People Talk or Write About Racism, VSB.

In our Google era, indexers are the unsung heroes of the publishing world, The Guardian.

Inside McMansion Hell, The Hairpin.

When her 5-year-old broke his leg, this mom raised $0. It’s actually inspiring., Upworthy.

And I finished reading Unmentionable: The Victorian Lady’s Guide to Sex, Marriage, and Manners!

Loving

Ashley Nicole Black and Trayvon Free talking about Maxine Waters, this Samantha Bee segment on untested rape kits, this album, the Done app for making sure I floss and take my allergy meds, and this tweet.

The week ahead…

Listening to the Big Little Lies opening song on repeat, and welcoming my new hire, who starts tomorrow!

12. Pulling out

March 26, 2017

Photo by Matt Crump

I didn’t have much time for reading this week, so I’m a little light on links tonight! Here’s what I got:

Writing

6 Incredibly Brave Women Who Took Down Nazis During World War II

Turns Out, Moths Are Hella Cute Up Close

Just 24 Really Funny Tweets About The Health Care Bill Withdrawal

Reading

I Loved My Grandmother. But She Was a Nazi., The New York Times. “My grandmother would shrug and answer something like, ‘He said a lot of things — I didn’t listen to all of them.’ Didn’t she see Jews being rounded up and taken away, or at a minimum, harassed by the police? No, she maintained, not in the countryside where she lived. And anyway, she was focused on her own problems, on making ends meet and, once the war began, protecting her children.”

My Boyfriend Weighs Less Than I Do, Ashley Ford on A Cup of Jo.

Just like her mother, Chelsea Clinton never gets a break, LA Times.

Trump Got To Sit In A Big Boy Truck Because Today Was A Special Day!, BuzzFeed.

Art Supply Sales Jumped in January, Thanks to Protest Signs, Report Says, The New York Times.

Former Thinx Employee Accuses Miki Agrawal of Sexual Harassment, NY Mag. This is like 10 times worse than I expected it to be.

Humans Made the Banana Perfect—But Soon, It’ll Be Gone, Wired.

23 Black Female Scientists Who Changed The Damn World, BuzzFeed.

The Friend Zone Isn’t a Thing and Women Don’t Owe You Shit, Vice. “‘Friend zone’ shames women for exercising their right to say no, just as ‘slut’ shames women for exercising their right to say yes (and ‘bitch’ attacks women for their right to call you out on your horseshit).”

7 Random Facts You’ll Want To Tell Everyone You Know ASAP, BuzzFeed.

Jenny Slate Talks About Her Breakup With Chris Evans, Vulture.

In Praise of an Aggressively Unfashionable Shoe, The New York Times Style Magazine.

Setting the Table, Edible Philly.

100 Memes For Everyone Who’s Soulless, Single, Poor, Petty, Extra, Thirsty, And Dramatic But Has A Gr8 Personality, BuzzFeed.

27 Hilarious Tweets About the Diva Cup That Will Make You Laugh and Cringe, BuzzFeed.

Plan Out A Saturday And We’ll Guess Your Age, BuzzFeed. This is art.

Woman Spends Five Years Grooming Boyfriend to be Great Husband to Lisa, Reductress. Too damn real. 

Loving

This extremely accurate comparison, this artist’s cartoons, this video, and this perfect gif.

The week ahead…

I’m already over it.

11. La belle et la bad boy

March 19, 2017

Hello again! I hope you all survived the completely rude combination of a blizzard and the onset of daylight saving time. Here’s what I was up to this week…

Writing

12 Pre-Disney Images Of “Beauty And The Beast” That Will Make You Question Everything

So, “The Bachelorette” Semi-Started Last Night And…Woof

18 Of The Wildest Moments From The Finale Of “The Bachelor”

Reading

I’m almost finished reading Unmentionable: The Victorian Lady’s Guide to Sex, Marriage, and Manners, which is delightful. The author’s style can be a teeny bit grating at times, but on the whole, it’s laugh-out-loud funny and very informative.

‘London Bridge is down’: the secret plan for the days after the Queen’s death, The Guardian. This is lovely and beautiful and sad; it’s a long read, but I didn’t want it to end.

On The Frightening Realities of Being a Woman in 2017, Billie Loo. (FYI, this contains photos and pretty graphic descriptions of violence against women.)

Green Beer and Rank Hypocrisy, The New York Times.

11 Things You Probably Didn’t Know Were Funded With Help From The National Endowment For The Arts, BuzzFeed.

‘My mum always told me I was white, like her. Now I know the truth’, The Guardian.

Thinx Promised a Feminist Utopia to Everyone But Its Employees, Racked. (Further reading: Miki Agrawal’s Panty Raid and this thread.)

This Twitter thread on the way racist images of black people have been used in advertising, and this one on the origin of the racist stereotypes about black people loving watermelon and fried chicken.

7 Facts You Can Blurt Out During Awkward Silences This Weekend, BuzzFeed.

17 Quick And Easy Cleaning Hacks That People Actually Swear By, BuzzFeed. These are all so good!

How to Read More Books When It Feels Like You Never Have Time, NY Mag.

19 Times Women Were Too Good And Pure For This World, BuzzFeed.

23 Emojis Apple Users Will Never Experience, BuzzFeed. I cackled my way through this.

Sorry for the Delayed Response, The New Yorker. “I totally meant to respond to this earlier, but I didn’t know the answer to your question and I kept not caring enough to ask anyone. Now a weird amount of time has passed, so I’m going to loop Laura (cc’d) into this e-mail thread to see if she can handle this. Laura?” Perfection.

Loving

Alex Jones doing impressions, this MSU student, this thread, Dr. Carol Anderson, Giphy’s Women’s History Month landing page, and this text from my mom.

The week ahead…

Just continuing to be a good Catholic girl. MC Solaar, hit it.

10. Get out

March 12, 2017

‘Truth Coming Out of Her Well’ by Jean-Léon Gérôme

Here’s something that has been on my mind this week: A few summers ago, I was on vacation with Eric and his family, when Eric’s dad started talking about “Obamaphones.” A group of us was sitting outside on the patio, and he went on about how all these poor people were lining up for their free phones, around the block, down the street…so many of them, he said, no jobs, but there to get their free iPhones from the president. Eric and I were incredulous (though I didn’t express my feelings) — like, everything about it was so truly ridiculous, I remember that Eric struggled to even form a response.

I think part of the reason the conversation stuck with me was because of where it happened: on a (wonderful!!) summer vacation at the family’s second home; the patio we were sitting on directly overlooks the fourth hole of the surreally beautiful golf course on which the house is located. It was the same patio where, at a different point during that trip, I came upon a group of white male relatives (nice people! truly! I cannot overstate this!) having a casual, non-heated, totally chill-ass discussion about whether or not it’s OK to display the Confederate flag. One relative (who I genuinely adore!!!) said that he’d heard some people say it was mostly about Southern pride. The one who disagreed took the position that it just seemed like “treason.” Race and slavery were never mentioned, not even when I finally — very hesitantly, very measuredly — said that I don’t think it’s OK to display the Confederate flag, and, after all heads turned to look at me, followed that with a careful, aggressively neutral, “I’ve heard the Southern pride thing…but what, exactly, is the South so proud of here?” There was a beat, and some “Mmm”s, and some brisk man-nods, and then we moved on.

Anyway, the Obamaphones conversation popped into my head twice this week. The first time was when Jason Chaffetz said that if poor people wanted healthcare, maybe they should just not buy a new iPhone. The comment was widely (appropriately!) called out in my corner of Twitter, but I keep thinking about how Chaffetz probably thought that large swaths of the voting public would agree with him. The fact that I saw “Obamaphones” spoken of with such derision on a beautiful, privileged patio by someone who doesn’t want for anything that money can buy makes me think that Chaffetz’s comment went over just fine in some parts of the country — really, any parts where people who have very nice things and who hate the idea that other people might also have nice things live. The other time I thought about it was after I saw Get Out — a highly entertaining movie that’s brilliant in so many ways; one of the things it does best is capturing exactly how unnerving nice things can be.

Here’s what else I got up to this week…

Writing

Are Your Pasta Habits Normal?

7 Wild Facts About Potatoes That You Didn’t Know And Will Now Want To Tell Everyone

9 Things You Probably Don’t Know About Daylight Saving Time

Reading

Why Ben Carson Said That, MTV.com. “Carson provides not simply symbolic cover for his fellow Republicans to push racist policy such as Trump’s discriminatory travel bans. By claiming that slaves were immigrants, he also positions that policy in a narrative of individualistic heroism. In those remarks, he added that enslaved Africans, too, ‘had a dream that one day their sons, daughters, grandsons, granddaughters, great-grandsons, great-granddaughters might pursue prosperity and happiness in this land.’ That isn’t a dissimilar message from what we hear in Maya Angelou’s poem ‘Still I Rise’: ‘I am the dream and the hope of the slave.’ But tied to this new idea of enslaved immigration, which isn’t a thing, Carson’s uplifting end note doesn’t just send a message to other black folks that ‘we started from the bottom, now we here.’ It’s more akin to ‘I started from the bottom, now I’m here. Why aren’t you?'”

In Get Out, Racism Is The Horror Story Black People Try To Survive, BuzzFeed.

Why Get Out Is the Best Movie Ever Made About American Slavery, Esquire.

Get Out Understands The Black Body, MTV.com.

22 Secrets Hidden In Get Out You May Have Missed, BuzzFeed.

23 Hilarious Tweets About Get Out, BuzzFeed.

What Do Feminists Owe Kellyanne Conway?, Jezebel. (Also: “highlights” from Kellyanne Conway’s book.)

Despite a mother’s plea, her mentally ill daughter was sold a firearm. Here’s why she sued., Washington Post.

The Trouble With Disney’s Remake Machine, BuzzFeed.

In Praise of the House Bra, Racked.

A 5-year-old, Edith Fuller, is headed to the National Spelling Bee. She’s the youngest contestant ever., Washington Post.

The New York Times Is Not Built For This, Deadspin.

NYPD ‘patrol pig’ hams it up downtown, NY Post. *siren noises*

The week ahead…

Ranting about how much I hate daylight saving time, obviously.

09. Maybe just…don’t?

March 5, 2017

mermaid art by Vashti Harrison

Art by Vashti Harrison; order a print here

Happy Sunday, my hot lil’ wire tappers! Here’s what I got up to this week…

Writing

17 Times Texans Reminded Everyone They Are Not To Be Messed With

+ a review of There Is No Good Card for This

Reading

I read Milk and Honey and I am still chugging along in A People’s History of the United States. Also…

Ask Polly: Am I Pretty?, NY Mag. “So how would that confident, calm person dress? How would she act? How would she spend her time? Do those things. It really is that simple. And that’s not faking it or pretending. That’s being who you already are; it just doesn’t show because you won’t let it show, because you’re ashamed.” This entire piece is very, very good.

I Did Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s Workout. It Nearly Broke Me., Politico.

Stop Telling Women Their Feminist Ideas Don’t Matter Because of How They Dress, Harper’s Bazaar. “There is no magic outfit that will make people who do not want to take you seriously take you seriously. Whatever you choose to wear, if you speak about something people don’t want to hear about, it will be used against you.”

You Can’t Balance Out Racism, Deadspin. “Look at what our national discourse has been reduced to. Here I am writing an essay pointing out that racism is bad. This is kindergarten material. We should not have to have these conversations. Our national media’s instinct to normalize whatever is happening among the politically powerful is so strong that they are now writing stories giving positive reviews to a speech in which the president just proposed one of the most baldly racist official government actions that I can remember. The fact that he stuck to the teleprompter does not balance this out.”

NBC and the Manufacturing of Donald Trump, Bitch.

When A Woman Deletes A Man’s Comment Online, The Establishment. “It has been really freeing, as a woman, to not have to ask permission or apologize for deleting a comment that I do not want. At first I just said no to really blatant hate. But now I delete whatever minimizes, distracts, obfuscates, or annoys — if I feel like it. It’s my house and you will get kicked out if you smash my windows, and you also don’t get to track mud all over my floors or change my radio station. It has been really freeing, as a woman of color, to be both public and to be able to say, ‘no, not here in my space.’ It has been empowering to know that yes, I could exist in the world and retain my right to refuse to engage with those who would force their way into my proximity. I don’t have to fight each individual foot soldier of oppression; I can keep my focus on the big picture and my fight on where it could be most effective.”

What Do We Do with the Clothing of Grief?, Racked.

Saving Nina Simone’s Birthplace as an Act of Art and Politics, The New York Times.

White Men Behaving Sadly, Bully Bloggers.

This Is How Your Hyperpartisan Political News Gets Made, BuzzFeed. Woof.

What’s In A Name: On Kimmel’s Casual Racism, Birth, Movies, Death.

Ivanka Trump And The Aesthetics Of Denial, BuzzFeed.

He’s a Local Pillar in a Trump Town. Now He Could Be Deported., The New York Times.

Why You Can’t Ever Call an Enslaved Woman a “Mistress”, Teen Vogue.

After 130 Years, Harvard Law Review Elects a Black Woman President, The New York Times.

This Far-Right Tweet About “The Future That Liberals Want” Backfired Into A Huge Meme, BuzzFeed.

What Is Your Name? Where Are We? Who Is President? Oh God., Slate.

I Can’t Help But Think These Pink Coveralls Would Change My Life, Racked. I…need these? I wore coveralls for a play in eighth grade and remain convinced that they are a truly perfect garment. And the pink!!! I love them so much. 

Patrick Stewart Will Look Great Forever, GQ. This is so effing charming.

Sean Spicer’s tragic fall from grace as White House Easter Bunny, A.V. Club. “Sean Spicer, the holy fool of the Russian tragedy novel that is our current existence, has been a reliable source of comic pathos ever since his first appearance as press secretary, be it the revelations of his years-long war against ice cream balls, his desperate attempts to laugh off Melissa McCarthy’s impressions of him, getting into a fight with the press over where he was born, or any of the many hourly humiliations he endures while attempting to deflect criticism of a president who repeatedly leaves him hanging, twisting in the wind of his baggy suits. But it wasn’t always this way.”

Loving

Jon Stewart taking the news media to task, this sweet thread, this time traveler, and this tweet.

The week ahead…

Living my life like Alex Jones: screeching, attempting to collect myself, pretending to be sorry, and then screeching some more.

08. Undone

February 26, 2017

All month, I’ve been trying to be better about unplugging before bed, but I hadn’t been doing a great job of it. Finally, last Sunday, I realized that I just needed to set an actual rule for myself. So I decided that I would read 20 pages in a book before bed. That’s it; that’s my rule. No reading for a set amount of time (which ends up stressing me out more for some reason)…just making reading 20 pages the last thing I do before bed. I haven’t hit the goal every night (and sometimes I am too tired to read 20 pages), but on the nights I’ve missed the goal, it’s been because I’ve been journaling, which I feel fine about. My book of choice is A People’s History of the United States, which I hadn’t read before, and which I’m really enjoying so far. (I mean, as much as one can an “enjoy” a book about all the terrible things white people have done.)

Here’s what else I got up to this week…

Writing

How Popular Are Your Opinions On Pens?

I’m Sorry I Made Fun Of Nick Viall For Wearing A Livestrong Bracelet

Just A Bunch Of Crazy Things That Happened During Hometown Dates On “The Bachelor”

Reading

Own, Apologize, Repair: Coming Back to Integrity, Nora Samaran on Dating Tips for the Feminist Man. This covers a lot but it’s really, really great.

Janet Mock: Young People Get Trans Rights. It’s Adults Who Don’t., The New York Times.

Maxine Waters Is Back and She’s Not Here to Play, ELLE.com. Hot damn, this is good.

Chill With The “Journalists Are Heroes” Thing, Deadspin. “My cursory viewing of CNN tells me that Jake Tapper has been consistently asking tough questions of lying White House functionaries who appear on his show. Does this make Jake Tapper a hero? No. It makes him a guy who is doing his job. (For which he is extremely well-compensated.) The national reporters at major news outlets have been turning out an admirable number of meaningful stories about the new administration’s mismanagement of the government. Again: this is literally their job description. I am glad that they are doing their jobs well, but it would be more remarkable if journalists were not able to produce good stories at a time of profound national crisis and routine public lying by top government officials. The level of heroism here is roughly the same as that displayed by a Subway™ sandwich artist who really nails the flavor on your turkey foot-long: give em Employee of the Month, sure, but let’s keep the Medal of Honor in reserve for now.”

I’m an Arab actor who’s been asked to audition for the role of terrorist more than 30 times. If La La Land cleans up at the Oscars, I’m done, The Independent.

Queens of the Stoned Age, GQ. This was a great read; I didn’t want it to end.

I Ordered Plan B And A Bacon, Egg, And Cheese On Seamless, BuzzFeed. The more you know!

I told my doctor I didn’t want kids. She sent me to a therapist., Vox.

Why Does Dating Men Make Me Feel Like Shit?, Emma Lindsay on Medium.

Y’all’s President Is a Lazy Thot, The Root.

The Bachelor Recap: No Place Like Home, Vulture. “The first ladytestant to drag this sad sack to her hometown is Raven. Raven is riding around in the swamps of Hoxie, Arkansas, and she says she’s ready to show Nick a new side of her: ‘a little fun, a little sassy, a little sexy.’ Today could be the day that she tells Nick she’s falling in love with him, and she says that there could be nothing better than falling in love in Hoxie. I can think of like 18 things better than falling in love in Hoxie. I looked up Hoxie to see if there were any other famous residents or fun landmarks. Guys. Hoxie is 98.15 percent white and is the home of the third school in Arkansas to integrate after Brown vs. Board of Education and is one of the first sites where the decision had to be defended after half of Hoxie’s white students boycotted school integration. I … I … I dug too deep.” This is a very, very good recap.

What Celebrities Wear Under Those Red Carpet Dresses, Racked.

I’ve Honestly Had Very Little Trouble With West Elm’s Peggy Couch, But Now I Fear Her, Jezebel.

60 Times I Laughed And/Or Gasped In Horror While Reading The “Bachelor” Book, BuzzFeed. I literally don’t know who any of these people are and I still laughed out loud multiple times when reading this.

The week ahead…

I mean, I can tell you what I won’t be doing, and that is picking a fight with the Anne Frank Center. Like…for fuck’s sake, people.

07. Words mean things

February 19, 2017

Recently I — and then, totally independently, two different friends did this exact same thing — have used the word “incredible” to describe a current news story, and then followed that up with, “I mean that in, like, the dictionary-definition, literal, like…biblical sense of the word. Like, this is…I N C R E D I B L E.” Because it is incredible. It’s all so incredible.

The other thing I’ve found myself saying is “words actually mean things” and “words have meanings.” I spent this week writing and editing thousands and thousands of words, so I’d sure like to believe that that’s true. But when our president shouts “fake news!” to shut down anyone who dares to criticize him, when white people are constantly telling people black people what counts as racism (hint: it’s…nothing, according to them), and when destructive men insist on rewriting history and constructing an alternative present in order to protect their fragile egos, and then turn around and accuse us of gaslighting them…it feels like maybe words don’t actually mean anything. Or perhaps words only mean things if certain men are saying them. And it’s all just incredible.

Here’s what else was on my mind this week…

Reading

Ask Polly: Men Are the Worst, and I’m Married to One!, New York Magazine. God, Polly’s answer is full of so many fantastic lines.

The Trash Heap Has Spoken, Guernica. This is a marvelous piece of writing.

Why Do Men Put on Basketball Shorts After Sex?, Racked. I, like, yelped when I saw this hed — I don’t know if I’ve ever been filled with such overwhelming love for men and hatred for men at the exact same time.

If You Care About Food, You Need to Care About Immigration Policy, Eater.

President Trump Has Done Almost Nothing, Politico. “There is a wide gap, a chasm even, between what the administration has said and what it has done. There have been 45 executive orders or presidential memoranda signed, which may seem like a lot but lags President Barack Obama’s pace. More crucially, with the notable exception of the travel ban, almost none of these orders have mandated much action or clear change of current regulations. So far, Trump has behaved exactly like he has throughout his previous career: He has generated intense attention and sold himself as a man of action while doing little other than promote an image of himself as someone who gets things done. It is the illusion of a presidency, not the real thing.”

Trump’s Radical Anti-Americanism, The New Yorker. This is actually quite lovely.

Why you should stop taking the GOP Media Accountability Survey — now., Katie Wohlgenant on Medium.

President Trump, White House Apprentice, The New York Times. “The White House is a toxic mix of ideology, inexperience and rivalries; insiders say tantrums are nearly as common as the spelling errors in the press office’s news releases.”

The New Twitter Detectives Want To Bring Down Trump Without Becoming Alex Jones, BuzzFeed.

Your Criticism Might Be Valid. It Might Also Be Sexist., Cosmopolitan.com.

29 Disturbing Pictures Of American Life Under Jim Crow, BuzzFeed.

The Story Behind Planet Earth II’s Unbelievable ‘Iguana vs. Snakes’ Chase Scene, Vulture. I watched this video twice and was straight-up YELLING.

75 Years of Crosswords, The New York Times.

How a Decision Journal Changed the Way I make Decisions, Farnam Street.

On “outrage” and “distractions”, Sunny Moraine on Twitter.

Why Does This One Couch From West Elm Suck So Much?, The Awl. This is so outrageous; I will legit never look at West Elm the same way again.

Emergency Preparedness Amongst the Liberal Elite, McSweeney’s.

34 Easy Ways To Lose Weight Fast, BuzzFeed. “You’re more likely to eat junk food when it’s in the house. Burn down your house.”

Loving

We’re Still Not There: A Practical Guide to Resistance, New Yorkers singing “A Whole New World” (yeah, I cried), and this video (also made me cry).

The week ahead…

Really looking forward to Planet Earth II tonight and a day off tomorrow!

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